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I try to walk around my neighborhood most every day. I’ve enjoyed watching all the flowers and trees along my walk. I have some very talented neighbors when it comes to gardening. They have some beautiful yards, flowers, trees, rock gardens and other awesome landscaping.

Almost every day I kick myself for not taking my camera along for the walk. I see so many things that would make the perfect picture. The other day I finally remembered to take my camera along for the trek.

Here’s just one of the beautiful sites that I saw on my trip. I’ll be adding more pics from my neighborhood later.

I took these pictures several weeks ago, but I’m just now getting around to uploading them here. I found these butterflies at my Mom’s house in Middle Tennessee. She has a tree that is oozing sap and butterflies and insects of all kinds like to visit often.

I don’t know much about butterflies. I did a Google search but couldn’t find much about blue butterflies and couldn’t find a match to anything that I thought looked like this one. I would love for someone that knows more about blue butterflies than I do to let me know what kind of butterfly this is. It’s one of the prettier ones I’ve seen.

Of course, butterflies symbolize freedom to me, which gives them a special place in my heart. To think of the struggle they go through to become this beautiful butterfly after living as a cocoon brings me peace about the struggles in my life.

I love homeschooling. I love homeschooling. I love homeschooling.

I’m trying to believe that this afternoon.

Today is one of those days when I really need to remind myself why I homeschool. My daughter, who really hates anything to do with books - especially if it looks like homework - is learning her multiplication tables. We’ve cried, we’ve fussed, we’ve even raised our voices on this issue. She is determined NOT to learn it and I am determined that she will.

She’s lost her TV priviledges and now her computer priviledges and I’m at a loss as to what I can take away next. But, I’m determined that she do the work.

I was reminded the other night that we can lead a horse to water. We can put her nose in the water. We can open her mouth. We can even force the water down her throat. But, we can’t make her swallow. And even if we somehow get her to swallow, we can’t make her keep it down.

And so, I ask myself once again WHY I do this. Why do I ‘fight’ with my children to make them learn this stuff? Why is it so easy to get caught in this trap?

I know the importance of her learning her multiplication tables. She doesn’t yet. She doesn’t understand why she needs to know this stuff.

I know she is smart enough to learn it and learn it quickly if she would just do it. The problem is that she doesn’t WANT to learn it. And so she has this block against really ‘getting it’.

I’ve seen it happen too many times in my children’s lives. They get it when they want to get it. They get it when they need it.

I’m reminded of when my son refused to learn to tie his shoes. And again when he refused to practice his handwriting. In both cases, we fussed and fought and argued and got upset and ruined our day all over tying shoes and handwriting. In the end, I realized that I could not FORCE him to do anything.

Now, my son can both tie his shoes and his handwriting is much better. Why? Because he finally saw the need to learn it. He WANTED to learn it.

When his younger sister learned to tie her shoes, he didn’t want to be outdone. He immediately learned to tie his shoes.

When he was around other children in Sunday School who were writing much neater than he could, he came home and asked me to buy him a handwriting book. When the book came in he was happy to sit down and practice his handwriting.

He knew why he needed to learn it. He was ready to learn it. He wanted to learn it. No more fighting.

So, why do I feel like I’m not doing ‘my job’ if I don’t ‘MAKE’ her learn her multiplication tables? I KNOW that she is not a better person for knowing her multiplication tables. She’s not even a smarter person just because she knows her multiplication tables. And I know that when she needs to know her multiplication tables in order to do something that she wants to accomplish, she will learn them.

I think I feel it’s my job because it’s what our society has trained us to think. My ‘real job’ is to teach her to love to learn. And to teach her that she CAN do anything she wants to do - she is the master and creator of her life. She has all the power she needs inside herself because she is a child of God. I am to teach her where to find the answers to anything in life and teach her to want to learn. The motivation to learn will come when she needs it - as long as I don’t kill her spirit.

This morning, I think I killed a little of her spirit. And I know it didn’t do my spirit much good. There’s more to life than multiplication tables. And if she needs them, she’ll figure them out. Because she knows that she can do anything she wants to do when she puts her mind to it. And if I know her, like I know her, it will all click with her really soon - as soon as I get off her back and quit ‘making’ her do it. Because as soon as I force her to do it, she turns off that part of her brain.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the battle. And forget to see it through love. I love her more than I love being right. Our relationship is much more important than her learning her multiplication tables. So, once again, the teacher has learned more than the student.

I had a great weekend. I took the weekend off, sent the kids to my Mom, and spent my time reading, watching movies, and doing as little as I could possibly get away with doing.

Yes, there were things I probably should have been doing. For those of you that may have been waiting for me to finish something for you, I apologize. It will get done. And I feel certain that it will get done when it’s supposed to get done. But, I needed this weekend. This weekend, although it may have seemed wasted to some, was totally inspired.

I finished at least 4 books, watched at least 4 or 5 movies, and spent countless hours just thinking or meditating about what I felt God was trying to teach me and tell me through all these books, movies, and circumstances that I’ve been placed in lately. I just want to know truth. I want to know what God wants me to know about abundance and my purpose on this earth.

It all came down to love. And then, as life started back after the holiday weekend, I attended my prosperity class and what do you suppose the lesson was about? Of course. Love. Everything I did over the weekend and even all day yesterday pointed to love. So, I know that must be the lesson that God is showing me.

Without love, nothing is meaningful. Without love, I will never find abundance. Without love, life is not life.

So, what did I learn about love?

• God is love. I could just stop here. Isn’t that all we really need to know about life? If God is love, then love should be my highest priority. If God is love, then I should spend all my time giving and receiving love. But, even these three words really demand more meditation to fully understand their meaning.
• All of 1 Corinthians 13. Read the chapter. I can not say it any better than that chapter. Read it. Read it again. Meditate on it. Read it again. Read it every day. Live by it. It really is what life is ALL about.
• We, as Americans and maybe the whole world, have taken the word love and watered it down and given it so many contexts that it’s hard to really understand the true meaning of the word. We love everything from our children to mashed potatoes and everything in between. We love football and our parents. But what does the TRUE meaning of love really mean? God. Unconditional, giving, sharing love. Not sex. Not like. Not tolerate. Not attracted to. But, deep-down, God-inspired, unattached, unconditional want-only-good for the other person.
• Love isn’t love until I give it away. You’ve probably heard this before, but the giving of love gives me more intense feeling than the receiving of love. My unconditional love says that I will give you love regardless of whether you return it or not. And I am still fulfilled regardless of how you respond to my love.
• Jesus tells me to love my neighbor as I love myself. I can not love my neighbor until I love myself first. I won’t have love to give if I don’t love myself. And I’m not talking about the same kind of love that I have for pizza. I’m talking about REALLY loving myself unconditionally and giving to myself.
• I must love the other person more than I love being right. People are more important than my pride and ego. As a matter of fact, I don’t think love is really love until I get rid of the pride and ego anyway.
• I will never reach abundance or prosperity without love first. Again, God is love. And He tells me that if I seek His kingdom and His righteousness (way of doing things) first, then everything else will be added to me.

There are many other lessons about love that I’m sure I will be touching on later. But, my time for today is running short. I really do have other things that MUST be done that I didn’t do over the weekend. And much of the lessons about love are still sinking in deep. They are rolling around in my head and my heart trying to figure out a way to express themselves in words. They will come. I feel sure of that.

Until then, meditate on love. Read about love. Express love. Do love. Be love. For God is love. Love is everything.

I read this book again today. I’ve read it before, but I’m glad I read it again. Every time I read it, I get more out of it. I heard Rhonda Byrne of The Secret say that this was the book that she read that turned her on to doing her research and creating the movie. That inspired me to read this book again. I’m providing the book for you here:

The Science of Getting Rich

Today, what I got from this read was that I need to ACT NOW on what I have NOW, on where I am NOW, and with WHO I’m with NOW. Only by being the best that I can be, right now, with what I already have, will I ever be able to increase. I must do my best work NOW. I can change the things I can change now - those things I can’t change right now, then I place them in my mind and get a good visual of them. Then I do the best I can do with what I have right now.

God wants me rich. Jesus came to give us abundant life. I can’t help others until I have an abundance of my own. I’m not just talking about money, I’m talking about EVERYTHING.

It’s not about competition, it’s about creation. I can create my abundance here and now. Creating my abundance benefits everyone - not just me. My gratitude plays a very important role in that creation. To those who have, more is given. To those who do not have, even what they have is taken away. We all have something. Be grateful for that something. I do not have to compete for my abundance. There is more than enough to go around. And I don’t have to be in a hurry, my abundance isn’t going to be taken by someone else. There’s more than enough to go around. As the old Doritos commercial says, “We’ll just make more!”